Look how far I have come. Work is progress part 1

 

I am still surprised that all together I have almost published 1k articles/posts. In the beginning it was a dream that gradually became a goal to keep up my writing. I want to thank one of my earlier blog supporters Mark Bialczak. Mark was one of the few bloggers that welcomed me to the community. I watch out for his posts so I could get a view of someone else’s world. I am not sure if he remembers the positive feedback that he gave me those first few days. I will always look up to you Mark.

 

Sara Gamachu’s YouTube Channel

I have been asked if I what I wrote about. I would smile and say “Whatever comes to my mind.” That is so true. I want followers and readers to be able to understand that someone else went down that road in life. It makes me feel relatable. Another thing that gave me courage to write was dealing with life after my divorce I began writing more about what was on my mind. From life as new mother who tbh (to be honest) realizing the difference between being a parent and a teacher’s assistant/daycare provider. My interests went in the direction of life being a single parent (specifically a single mom). It is a lot tougher than people could realize. Among several things I was terrified at the time this was something I was actually proud. In fact it was something brought up in my divorce hearing. I was shocked and proud it being brought up by the judge. That was when I was working on mahaleta98.wordpress.com. Sara Gamachu was something I began to start about my life after my divorce. I needed an outlet at the time to help me get through situation of having to take care of myself and not really knowing how to start.

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It has been several months since I began this post. A lot has happened. I have inched passed my milestone of 1k posts. That is huge for me. I also have been hosting my podcast of Sara’s Journal.

The reason I chose to host my own podcast because I wondered if there were others who were going through the same parts of life as I was. In fact as of today I have hit another milestone of being a former in patient of a behavioral health recovery. It has been a difficult struggle taking my medicine and trying to get back on a healing lifestyle. There are days when I just don’t want to take my meds because I am just tired of them. Than I realize how much of a bitch I would be without them. That usually helps me get back on track. I decided to come and visit my parents when I realized that things were getting too tough for me to deal with the current stages of my life. The thought of ending my life not once, but three times was something I am ashamed of. On the third visit I figured out that it was better to get checked back in before the stress got to me again.

Another subject that I discuss is/was being a single parent before I actually was a single mother. Imagine how it would feel to be taking care of a young child on your own while your spouse goes on a childish phase where being a gamer was more important than being a parent. The first two years of my son’s life that was exactly what happened. I spent my days taking caring for myself

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3rd Week of May and 3 posts until my 1000 all time posts milestone.

Almost the end of another month. I have had a great time with my whole immediate family. It makes me feel really good. My week has consisted of listening to podcast (Shoutout to Rachel Hollis)! I want to thank Anchor and Spotify for carrying Sara’s Journal. I have hit a big milestone of getting close to finishing my 3rd season of Sara’s Journal.  I might take a little break of writing and podcasting to recharge my batteries. 

 

I have tried doing some live videos on TikTok. I feel like I need to do photos, art, and regular videos.  I need to get my brand made before I could get to that next step.  I am doing a lot of these projects so I can rebuild my confidence.  On my of personal healing it is not as easy.  I am at the beginning stage after you get out of the hospital and surround yourself with your family taking the steps towards getting my feet back on the ground. My dreams to be a motivational speaker are still the same.  I just am taking the long way around this trip.

 

 

 

Oh my gosh I am on the Reader.

I was looking at the Reader planning on which to save.  The saved list gives me some ideas on whether I should reblog or not.  As I was scrolling down I almost shouted.  Two of my posts on Sara’s Journal were on the screen.  I was so excited and shocked at the same time. This is a huge milestone because I rarely see my work on the Reader.  Thank you wordpress!  You guys are awesome!

 

Sara

2nd week of May.

My birthday was a blast! The next day I had a immediate family party with cake, pizza, popcorn (which is cultural), and the best part sodas. It made me feel loved. I enjoyed reading the posts on Facebook from friends and family sending me love. I got more messages telling me the same. It truly was just what I needed. At one point I asked my mom why I wasn’t born on Cinco De Mayo. It would have been easier to celebrate with tacos every year and nachos to boot.

My physical health is going well. I am eating again (after being sick for a week) and the food is staying down. Yay! I am very happy because I was hungry and thirsty (more of the latter). I was weak and thought I was going to die. Considering this is a few days since my discharge from the hospital milestone which is now 10 months. That was making me feel awful and scared because I couldn’t keep down my anxiety/depression medication. My mind was going through a whirl and I was just trying to stay positive.

If you are wondering what I am doing on the days that I am not writing check out my podcast Sara’s Journal by Sara Gamachu. Yep I am recording weekly for now and trying to keep up with my episodes. I was asked what to I talk about. I thought about it for a second and responded “Whatever is on my mind.” It is true readers. It might be about a movie I just watched, a book I may have read, or life in mental health recovery. I take pictures and draw different things with my MandalaMaker app. I have listened to 12 books from my Audible library since signing up.

When I am not podcasting or drawing there are other passions that I am trying out.  I got back on TikTok and started sharing my photos, drawing, and I dabble in doing some video recording also.  My big thing is that I am trying to not be as nervous when I am well showing myself.  I am getting better each post that I record.  I want to show people the process of building your self confidence by using my podcasts and video posts.  I still stutter or start laughing.  I prove that I am human and accept myself even with my weaknesses.